Things I would tell my brothers biological father

My brother has every reason to be mad at the world.


He isn’t.




Matt wasn’t planned. When mum found out she was pregnant she decided to put him up for adoption but when he was born she couldn’t let him go.  Mum fell in love with Matt the minute she saw him and 21 years later people still do. 


His Father didn’t give himself that chance. He will never know what he missed out on by turning his back on his son....

 


Matt is resilient.  He has seen first hand that life is not fair but he has never indulged in self-pity. Matt has always worked hard to find the good in life, the silver lining, a reason to keep going all things considered which to me (an expert at feeling sorry for myself) is nothing short of inspirational. 


My little brother is the most generous person I know. The day he started earning a wage he started spending it on other people. For him, you couldn’t put a price on a gesture - and gestures are his second language.  Not only is he generous with his modest wage, he is endlessly generous with his time.  It doesn’t matter how long and of little interest my story is to him, if its important to me he’s listening.  And if he’s not listening  (likely because I’ve been vainly talking about myself for the best part of an hour) he does a damn good job of pretending for my sake. 


Easy-going is an understatement when it comes to describing my bother.  Nothing is ever a big deal for Matt, no problem is without a solution.  Matt is not highly strung or easily wound up (I’ve tried), he has time for everyone (within reason) and will go out of his way to make life easier for someone in his life if he is able to.


Despite the fact that i’ve been telling him for 21 years that he is not as funny as he thinks, he actually is. Not only does Matt know how to laugh at himself, he knows how to make even the most serious people laugh at themselves too.


Matt is simple, he’ll buy a shirt from the warehouse because a shirt is a shirt. He doesn’t lose perspective, he’s not superficial or materialistic, he doesn’t judge a book by its cover (he doesn’t read books but you know.. if he did..) he’s not pretentious or snobby and he doesn’t make me feel bad (much) for my own snobby and pretentious tendencies. 


Matt is forgiving. He has forgiven the world for the shitty hands he has been delt. He’s forgiven countless people who have failed to put him first or let him down in some way. He’s even forgiven me for the time I tied his favourite teddy to a tree and then couldn’t get it back down. I don’t know who taught Matt how to forgive, it certainly isn’t something that was ever demonstrated in our house hold but it is a testament to his ability to find the good in life.


My baby brother has supported me more times than I have ever supported him. He would drop everything if someone he loved was in trouble - I’ve seen it, and it is the definition of love. 


Matt is loving, he loves his girlfriend possibly more than anyone loves anything. I know this because he told me when he was drunk - eight times - he also told multiple strangers. Matt is sensitive and empathetic while also being one of the strongest people I know. 


I don’t know how Matt grew up to be such a genuinely good person when he came from the same family as me (and I’m a sarcastic bitch 90 percent of the time) but he is probably the best person I know.


He’s the car that pulls up beside you when you’re walking home in the rain. 

Things I would say to my brothers biological brother would begin and end with 'you screwed up.

Happy 21st little bother. I will never (ever) say anything like this ever again but I am truly proud to call myself your sister (albeit, often a little skeptical ) and I love you despite that time you let my kitten out of the house while I was at a sleepover and she never game back.